the way of love
1 Corinthians 13: 1-13
preached on October 11, 2015
And so we continue with our series on the way of love…
A little refresher, about this letter Paul is writing to the community at Corinth to show love as the ultimate goal of the Christian life. To insist that love must govern, must undergird, must inform all the actions of this brand new and still forming church. Everything that the church does is to be done in love.
Here, love is presented not at as a warm and gooey feeling inside our hearts or tummies, but as a quality, a character attribute that is to be shown forth in the actions of members of the church. And the reason he is writing this to the Corinthians is because he’s heard that what’s been going on there is quite the opposite. And so, Paul writes right before chapter 13 begins, “I will show you still a more excellent way.” And the way he is talking about is love. (1)
This way of love, Paul reminds us, is not one we fully understand. it is a path that we discover as we go. we trip and fall, we stumble, but when we trust in God we trust that we are walking the way of love.
when we are on the way of love, the promise is that we will know fully and be fully known. In love those two go together. It is the experience of knowing and of being known that leads to love. Not only in romantic love, but in love in action as well, for Paul does not speak of love as a feeling or an attitude, rather “love” is the generic name for specific actions of patient and costly service to others. (2)
Love does not mean uncritical acceptance, sometimes it means speaking hard truths. And sometimes the hard truth is not just disagreeing with someone, but saying (whether to them or to ourselves) I disagree but you are a person, created and treasured by God, just like I am. As election time ramps up and we already see and hear candidates tearing each other down and the divide in our country grows deeper and wider, what do Paul’s words about love have to say to us?
I’m reminded that again and again, Jesus says that the last shall be first, that the first shall be last; that the poor are blessed, that the smallest will be the greatest, that prostitutes make great dinner guests, and lepers are worthy of being hugged. It makes me wonder if our need for pure, one-or-the-other, left-or-right, right-or-wrong categories is not true religion but actually, maybe, the antithesis of love. Knowing what category to place poison ivy in might help us know whether it’s safe to touch, but knowing what category to place ourselves and others in does not help us know God in the way that we have so often tried to convince ourselves it does. (3)
First Corinthians 13 ought to encourage us to step back from even our most cherished and fiery opinions, rants, ways of being, and ask “Why am I doing this?” If I cannot honestly say, “I am doing this for love and in love,” then the legitimacy of my whole enterprise must come under serious doubt.
This test applies across our lives: business, academics, politics… love is the lens through which we must view our whole selves, our whole lives, our whole being. Especially knowing that love is the lens through which God views us.
And that is a good thing! That God views us through the lens of love, because as Paul reminds us, we are fully known by God. And I think that being known is the hardest and easiest thing we can do.
It’s easiest because, when it comes to God, we have no choice. Every week when we gather around the font we proclaim that God already knows our sins. God knows the things we mutter under our breath, God knows the fears we won’t let bubble up to the surface, God knows the times we have felt shame or hate or resentment or all of the above. And we also proclaim that in the eyes of God those things are all washed away. Now we may only remind ourselves of that once a week, but it is true every day.
Being known by others is also quite possibly the hardest thing we can do. Brené Brown is a writer and shame researcher, and she writes and talks a lot about what it is to be known by others.
The word persona is the Greek term for “stage mask.” Brown talks about masks and armor as perfect metaphors for how we protect ourselves from the discomfort of vulnerability. Masks make us feel safer even when they become suffocating. Armor makes us feel stronger even when we grow weary from dragging the weight around. The irony is, she says, that when we’re standing across from someone who is hidden or shielded by masks and armor, we feel frustrated and disconnected. That’s the paradox, she says. Vulnerability is the last thing I want you to see in me, but the first thing I look for in you. (4)
And so being fully known is scary, because being known equals being vulnerable. To love we have to put ourselves out there, knowing that we have no idea what will happen. We might do something right, we might do something wrong and it might set us back for a while, but we still work to stay on the way of love.
Paul reminds us of that when he says that now we see in a mirror, dimly. But he promises that then, that eventually, in God’s time, we will see face to face. We will know fully as we also have been fully known.
At the end of Paul’s beautiful reflection on love, he reminds us that this vision of community, that the way of love, is ultimately not about knowing or doing things, but is about knowing a person “face to face” and that living in such a community is merely a reflection of our having first been known and caught up in the love of God (13:12). (5)
It takes a lot to know a person face-to-face. It takes risk. It takes a willingness to be changed by others and to step into the mess and muck of other people’s lives. The people who are known for their love are the ones who are most willing to do that, to meet people where they are and love them, as they are.
The Appalachia Service Project, also known as ASP, is the organization that runs the summer youth mission trips that our high schoolers participate in to make homes warmer, safer and drier for residents of Appalachia. The folks at ASP have a motto, “we accept people right where they are, just the way they are.” The most important asset at ASP is not that you have a construction background or can take perfect measurements in a kitchen the first time around, “more important than construction know-how is a willingness to enter the communities and homes of Central Appalachia with sensitivity, concern, and love — accepting people right where they are and just the way they are.” (6)
Loving someone is trying to know them, and in that knowing, not judging them but accepting them in that moment, right in front of us.
And so, Paul goes on encourages us to “pursue love.” It’s not passive, but something we are constantly doing, seeking, walking, trying. The way of love is not an easy one to travel, and it’s not one we can travel half-heartedly. There is a cost.
We might not encounter those people who we expect to encounter, we might not be asked to do the things we expect to be asked to do. Love takes risk.
The way of love requires us to be in the arena, as Brené Brown calls life. It requires us to take the risk that is showing up, trying to do the right thing and then trying again if we fail.
I think the Christian life is one of showing up. Not just here on Sunday mornings, but every day. Showing up for that person in your office who is grieving, showing up for that classmate of yours who is always the odd one out when it’s time to get into groups, showing up for something that maybe you would rather not do, but you know it will make a difference in someone’s day.
The way of love requires our whole selves. Jesus tells us that the greatest commandment is this- love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength. And the second one is like it, love your neighbor as your self. This love is not something that can be done halfway, partially, with just our mind or just our hearts. Love must be lived in our words, in our work, in our play, in our wallets and in our bank statements, in the voting booth, every where we go and in everything we do.
Paul closes his meditation on love with a scary thought… that we humans know only in part. God is the only one who fully knows.
That can be scary, not knowing. Many of you know that I am a self-confessed planner and I live by my iPhone calendar, without which I would be completely lost. But perhaps not knowing it all allows us to be taken unaware by the grace of God, to be surprised by the things God is doing around us, among us and through us.
And so we keep the faith, lift up our hope and continue on the way of love. Faith is the trust that we have in the God of Israel, God who has kept faith with us through continued covenant promises; from a rainbow in the sky to a baby born to two refugees in Bethlehem. Hope focuses our fervent desire to see a broken world restored by God to its rightful wholeness. And finally, love. Love is the foretaste of our ultimate union with God, graciously given to us now and shared with our brothers and sisters. Love is the greatest because, even in the present time, it undergirds everything else, it informs every moment of our lives, it gives meaning to an otherwise unintelligible world. (7)
And it is only when love presides over our common life in the church and outside these walls, when love is the way that we live, that our gifts will find their rightful place and achieve the purposes for which God has given them to us.
Most importantly, Paul does not forget that we are still on the road, learning the way of love, that we go forward as best as humanly possible. Fortunately for all of us “love is patient.”
Citations:
- Hays, Richard B. Interpretation, A Commentary for Preaching and Teaching: 1 Corinthians, age 221.
- Hays, 222.
- Bolz-Weber, Nadia. Accidental Saints, page 7.
- Brown, Brene. Daring Greatly, page 113
- http://www.workingpreacher.org/preaching.aspx?commentary_id=1540
- http://www.asphome.org/about/
- Hays, 222.
courage in the cracks 